OK, not by the end of THIS month - but this month is SO close to being over, and it sounds a lot better to say that we'll have a baby by the end of this month than by the end of next month. Because next month is almost this month.
Honestly, I have so many mixed emotions about all this. I don't want a c-section, but I do love the fact that there's an end in sight (as I told my doctor today - they always say nobody's been pregnant forever, but at times, it can certainly feel like you have been!) Still, I'm super nervous about the surgery, even MORE nervous about the recovery, and am praying like crazy that I'm going to go into labor on my own before that.
Exciting news though - I may get to be part of a documentary that will appear on lifetime. They're filming at the hospital I'm delivering at, and I applied on a whim. My due date falls AFTER they'll be filming, but with the c-section I'm in right in the knick of time. So I will definately be filmed for it - however, they said they're filming EVERYONE and then deciding who makes the cut later - so just because I get filmed doesn't mean I'm in. Still, it's exciting, and I'll let you all know what happens with it.
Alright, that's about it. I'm going to go lay down. Today I feel like I could hibernate ALL day and STILL be exhausted, and I need to rest up because it's trick or treat night!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
34 weeks
Sorry I've been slacking on the writing. Honestly, it's been pretty busy around here, and I'm so full of complaints I wanted to spare you guys, lol. I'm trying not to complain TOO much - after all, I still remember just how badly I wanted this, but if you've been pregnant before you know you hit a point where as much as you want it, you're just done.
I have reached my point, lol.
The good news is, since they want to schedule a c-section at 39 weeks, as of today I have 5 weeks left. 35 days. That's crazy, huh? Just a little over a month and we'll be a family of four, and I'll probably be complaining about being pooped on and lack of sleep. But honestly, I'm oh-so-excited to see Cayden with his little brother. And I'm excited to see this little guy so we can finally name him. I have several names that I like, but I just can't pick. We originally went back to the original of Elijah, but I told a few people and it just didn't feel right, so now I'm back to the wait and see.
So, 35 days and we're done. And maybe even less if this not so little one decides to come on his own - which I'm praying and will be doing everything in my power (that's safe!) to try to help him along (not now of course, I have at least 3 more weeks until he's full term, so just twiddling my thumbs until then!)
My baby shower was this weekend, and it sucked. My two friends that threw it did a really awesome job, had fabulous decorations, games planned, wonderful food. But out of the 15 people who rsvp'd yes? Only one showed up. And then another person who RSVP'd maybe showed. I had 2 people at my shower. And it just kind of hurts my feelings. I know - it's a second baby and so some people think a second shower is tacky, but if that was how they felt, why even bother to rsvp yes? I just think it's rude. My hostesses wasted their time and money getting ready for that many people, only to have two show. And I've only had one person explain to me why they weren't there, and that was another maybe. Nobody else has said anything to me.
My MIL struck again too. Jeremy called her to see if she wanted a ride to come to the shower - and she said no. So, no excuse, just didn't want to come. Then she called Sunday evening, and I'm thinking, oh - she wants to at least see how the shower went, that's nice of her. But nope. Didn't ask about the shower at all. Just wanted to see when we were bringing back the table we borrowed - and then got pissed when Jeremy said we wouldn't be making a special trip to bring it back (if they needed it for something, we would, but they don't, so it's a hassle to drag it all the way up there when we have no other reason to go up there.)
So those two things combined just made me done. I'm not inviting people to things anymore when they don't show up - and if they get hurt about not being invited I'm going to be honest - it's a waste of an invitation. And that goes for when the baby is born. My in laws won't know the c-section due date, and after having the baby I'll see when I feel up to having them over. If that means it's a week after the baby is born, so be it. I know a lot of people are like "but they're family, you can't do that" or "You're stooping to her level" but here's my thing: Yes, she's family. But she's not really acting like it when she's skipping out on family events simply because she doesn't feel like going or wants to exert her control or whatever. And if she was really excited about this pregnancy, she's only shown it when there's someone to show off too. She hasn't cared about the ultrasound pictures, she hasn't bought anything for the baby, she can't even be bothered to ask how things are going. And I don't see it as stooping to her level - I just don't want to be stressed out about her on a day that is supposed to be happy.
That's about it, pretty much. I have a doctors appointment Thursday and will let you all know how it goes then. Maybe I'll get a c-section date. I'm not excited about having it on the books, but I AM excited about having an end date in site :-)
I have reached my point, lol.
The good news is, since they want to schedule a c-section at 39 weeks, as of today I have 5 weeks left. 35 days. That's crazy, huh? Just a little over a month and we'll be a family of four, and I'll probably be complaining about being pooped on and lack of sleep. But honestly, I'm oh-so-excited to see Cayden with his little brother. And I'm excited to see this little guy so we can finally name him. I have several names that I like, but I just can't pick. We originally went back to the original of Elijah, but I told a few people and it just didn't feel right, so now I'm back to the wait and see.
So, 35 days and we're done. And maybe even less if this not so little one decides to come on his own - which I'm praying and will be doing everything in my power (that's safe!) to try to help him along (not now of course, I have at least 3 more weeks until he's full term, so just twiddling my thumbs until then!)
My baby shower was this weekend, and it sucked. My two friends that threw it did a really awesome job, had fabulous decorations, games planned, wonderful food. But out of the 15 people who rsvp'd yes? Only one showed up. And then another person who RSVP'd maybe showed. I had 2 people at my shower. And it just kind of hurts my feelings. I know - it's a second baby and so some people think a second shower is tacky, but if that was how they felt, why even bother to rsvp yes? I just think it's rude. My hostesses wasted their time and money getting ready for that many people, only to have two show. And I've only had one person explain to me why they weren't there, and that was another maybe. Nobody else has said anything to me.
My MIL struck again too. Jeremy called her to see if she wanted a ride to come to the shower - and she said no. So, no excuse, just didn't want to come. Then she called Sunday evening, and I'm thinking, oh - she wants to at least see how the shower went, that's nice of her. But nope. Didn't ask about the shower at all. Just wanted to see when we were bringing back the table we borrowed - and then got pissed when Jeremy said we wouldn't be making a special trip to bring it back (if they needed it for something, we would, but they don't, so it's a hassle to drag it all the way up there when we have no other reason to go up there.)
So those two things combined just made me done. I'm not inviting people to things anymore when they don't show up - and if they get hurt about not being invited I'm going to be honest - it's a waste of an invitation. And that goes for when the baby is born. My in laws won't know the c-section due date, and after having the baby I'll see when I feel up to having them over. If that means it's a week after the baby is born, so be it. I know a lot of people are like "but they're family, you can't do that" or "You're stooping to her level" but here's my thing: Yes, she's family. But she's not really acting like it when she's skipping out on family events simply because she doesn't feel like going or wants to exert her control or whatever. And if she was really excited about this pregnancy, she's only shown it when there's someone to show off too. She hasn't cared about the ultrasound pictures, she hasn't bought anything for the baby, she can't even be bothered to ask how things are going. And I don't see it as stooping to her level - I just don't want to be stressed out about her on a day that is supposed to be happy.
That's about it, pretty much. I have a doctors appointment Thursday and will let you all know how it goes then. Maybe I'll get a c-section date. I'm not excited about having it on the books, but I AM excited about having an end date in site :-)
Thursday, October 21, 2010
What do YOU think?
So we all know how well I get along with my MIL. Lately it's been coming to a head - I don't know if it's the pregnancy hormones or just enough being enough, or a combination of both, but I am D-O-N-E with her.
She's not coming to my baby shower. After this whole big show at Cayden's birthday party (my friend who's throwing the shower was the same one who let us borrow her house - so she was at the party obviously. When she asked MIL if she was coming to the shower, my MIL made this huge loud deal in front of everyone - "Oh I'm NANA, of COURSE I'll be there. I can't miss it because I'm NANA." Gag me with a spoon.) she's not coming. She blames my FIL and says that he forgot to request off work. And you know, maybe she's telling the truth. But that's the thing when you cry wolf so many times, nobody believes you when the real time comes. I just have my suspicions, and I know my FIL has requested off work with less time, and has just called off work for less reason. The shower is also pretty early in the afternoon, and he probably could arrange his schedule to work later.
But of course, that all would require effort on their part. So she's not into it.
It's really the straw that broke my back, I'm so fed-up it's not even funny. It's like, if you made that big of a deal about being there, you need to be there. It's just all about the show with her, and I just want to scream put up or shut up lady!
So, I decided that when we get a c-section date, I'm not telling them. Why should they get to be there? I don't want them there, they just stress me out, and I don't think that they even WANT to be there to see the baby - just to put on another "I'm the best Grandma in the world" show. I especially look at Cayden's birth and how that went down, and I just don't want it to be like that. Them showing up late and me being miserable and MIL snapping pictures of me and talking about how horrible I looked and laughing about it.
Jeremy is totally on board with not telling them an advance date. He only requests that if it IS a c-section and I am hospitalized, that they are allowed to visit in the hospital - but it can be the day after or even two days after if I want, which I think is fair.
My Mom, however, thinks this is HORRIBLE, and says I can't do this to them. Again, in my opinion, they did it to themselves. They've shown pretty much zero interest in this baby, unless it's to someone else and they can put on their act. And, I mean... Plenty of women go into labor spontainously and don't call people until it's over. Is there a difference?
My friend thinks that I should tell them but then let them know we're asking people to wait until we call to come to the hospital. She thinks that hiding a date from them will start trouble. My fear is though, that they won't listen and will show up when they feel like it (kinda like how at Cayden's birthday we told them not to show up till 12:30 and they called us at 11 and were around the corner.)
So. What would you do?
She's not coming to my baby shower. After this whole big show at Cayden's birthday party (my friend who's throwing the shower was the same one who let us borrow her house - so she was at the party obviously. When she asked MIL if she was coming to the shower, my MIL made this huge loud deal in front of everyone - "Oh I'm NANA, of COURSE I'll be there. I can't miss it because I'm NANA." Gag me with a spoon.) she's not coming. She blames my FIL and says that he forgot to request off work. And you know, maybe she's telling the truth. But that's the thing when you cry wolf so many times, nobody believes you when the real time comes. I just have my suspicions, and I know my FIL has requested off work with less time, and has just called off work for less reason. The shower is also pretty early in the afternoon, and he probably could arrange his schedule to work later.
But of course, that all would require effort on their part. So she's not into it.
It's really the straw that broke my back, I'm so fed-up it's not even funny. It's like, if you made that big of a deal about being there, you need to be there. It's just all about the show with her, and I just want to scream put up or shut up lady!
So, I decided that when we get a c-section date, I'm not telling them. Why should they get to be there? I don't want them there, they just stress me out, and I don't think that they even WANT to be there to see the baby - just to put on another "I'm the best Grandma in the world" show. I especially look at Cayden's birth and how that went down, and I just don't want it to be like that. Them showing up late and me being miserable and MIL snapping pictures of me and talking about how horrible I looked and laughing about it.
Jeremy is totally on board with not telling them an advance date. He only requests that if it IS a c-section and I am hospitalized, that they are allowed to visit in the hospital - but it can be the day after or even two days after if I want, which I think is fair.
My Mom, however, thinks this is HORRIBLE, and says I can't do this to them. Again, in my opinion, they did it to themselves. They've shown pretty much zero interest in this baby, unless it's to someone else and they can put on their act. And, I mean... Plenty of women go into labor spontainously and don't call people until it's over. Is there a difference?
My friend thinks that I should tell them but then let them know we're asking people to wait until we call to come to the hospital. She thinks that hiding a date from them will start trouble. My fear is though, that they won't listen and will show up when they feel like it (kinda like how at Cayden's birthday we told them not to show up till 12:30 and they called us at 11 and were around the corner.)
So. What would you do?
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Well, the results are in...
Funny story first - I walked into the room and they asked me why I hadn't found out the sex - if I didn't want to know or if they just hadn't been able to tell. I told them I had wanted to know, but they hadn't been able to tell. The tech said "This late in the game it's cramped so I don't know if I'll be able to tell, but if I see I'll let you know."
OK, that's fine, I wasn't really expecting much anyway. She put the wand on my belly and what's the first thing we see? A scrotum. Definately boy number two. It was just funny to me because the smaller they are they easier it's supposed to be to see, but of course, leave it to my child to fight it until the very end, and then when I've pretty much given up: BAM, there it is.
As for other things... Chances of my VBAC are low. Bummer, huh? Turns out all my ranting about how I knew this baby was small? Wrong. Very wrong. I know ultrasounds can be wrong, and I've heard many stories of women induced early because they'll be having big babies, only to have normal or small babies. However, even in the wide "range" they gave me, the smallest this baby is right now, is 4.5 lbs. I believe that from what the books say, the baby is growing .5 lbs until 36 weeks, and then a pound a week from there on out. Which means if I go to 40 weeks, I'm looking at a 10 lb baby. They also say that every baby you have gets bigger - Cayden was 8 lbs 10 oz at birth and came a week early. And they're actually estimating the baby to be 5 lbs 3 oz right now. So. A 10 lb baby doesn't seem too far fetched.
I wanted to fight it, but honestly I feel like the tech did a really good job measuring - she measured several times and rechecked her numbers and even gave me that range - she said the baby is between 4.5 and 6 lbs. I talked to my doctor and I thought I'd walk in and she'd demand a c-section - but she didn't. Which honestly shocked the crap out of me, because the way she's talked in the past has been pretty c-section pushing. We decided together that we'll schedule a section for 39 weeks. If I go into labor before then, they'll let me labor and try for my VBAC. But they won't induce me, and they won't let me go past 40 weeks, so I think this is a good compromise. I'll be trying a few Old Wives tales to get me going sooner - although I am a firm believer in the fact that if it's not your time to go into labor, you won't. But we'll see. I also forgot to ask if the doc would strip my membranes or if she would consider that inducement, but I'll be asking that at my next appointment. Obviously I won't be doing that or any other method of inducement for a few more weeks, but I just wanna have my ducks in a row.
Now for some pictures, because they FINALLY gave me some:
That's the "money shot" - they tell me it's a penis. Half the time in ultrasounds I have no idea what I'm looking at, but she seemed really sure. So I am too.
That's showing the baby's hair, which apparently he's got a ton of, the tech seemed impressed and just kept going "Wow."
This is the face, which I thought was super clear but everyone seems to be having a hard time seeing. The forehead is up on the right side and angled downwards, with the black spots being eyes, then the nose, then lips, and he's got a hand tucked under his chin.
Profile shot.
We got to see the baby practice breathing and I also got a shot of the baby with his eyes open, but I thought it looked kinda creepy, so I didn't post.
Here's a few pictures of big brother from his birthday that I kept promising to post and have been super lazy.
Those two were at the fire museum, because my son LOVES "mew-mews" (aka fire trucks)
Fixing his car.
Those were at his party. I thought the one with him and baby Kermit was especially cute - baby Kermit was on the floor by the door waiting to go and Cayden walked up to him on his own and playing with him so gently. Makes me super excited to see him with the new baby :-)
Next posting if I stop being lazy again I'll post pictures of our pumpkin adventures.
OK, that's fine, I wasn't really expecting much anyway. She put the wand on my belly and what's the first thing we see? A scrotum. Definately boy number two. It was just funny to me because the smaller they are they easier it's supposed to be to see, but of course, leave it to my child to fight it until the very end, and then when I've pretty much given up: BAM, there it is.
As for other things... Chances of my VBAC are low. Bummer, huh? Turns out all my ranting about how I knew this baby was small? Wrong. Very wrong. I know ultrasounds can be wrong, and I've heard many stories of women induced early because they'll be having big babies, only to have normal or small babies. However, even in the wide "range" they gave me, the smallest this baby is right now, is 4.5 lbs. I believe that from what the books say, the baby is growing .5 lbs until 36 weeks, and then a pound a week from there on out. Which means if I go to 40 weeks, I'm looking at a 10 lb baby. They also say that every baby you have gets bigger - Cayden was 8 lbs 10 oz at birth and came a week early. And they're actually estimating the baby to be 5 lbs 3 oz right now. So. A 10 lb baby doesn't seem too far fetched.
I wanted to fight it, but honestly I feel like the tech did a really good job measuring - she measured several times and rechecked her numbers and even gave me that range - she said the baby is between 4.5 and 6 lbs. I talked to my doctor and I thought I'd walk in and she'd demand a c-section - but she didn't. Which honestly shocked the crap out of me, because the way she's talked in the past has been pretty c-section pushing. We decided together that we'll schedule a section for 39 weeks. If I go into labor before then, they'll let me labor and try for my VBAC. But they won't induce me, and they won't let me go past 40 weeks, so I think this is a good compromise. I'll be trying a few Old Wives tales to get me going sooner - although I am a firm believer in the fact that if it's not your time to go into labor, you won't. But we'll see. I also forgot to ask if the doc would strip my membranes or if she would consider that inducement, but I'll be asking that at my next appointment. Obviously I won't be doing that or any other method of inducement for a few more weeks, but I just wanna have my ducks in a row.
Now for some pictures, because they FINALLY gave me some:
That's the "money shot" - they tell me it's a penis. Half the time in ultrasounds I have no idea what I'm looking at, but she seemed really sure. So I am too.
That's showing the baby's hair, which apparently he's got a ton of, the tech seemed impressed and just kept going "Wow."
This is the face, which I thought was super clear but everyone seems to be having a hard time seeing. The forehead is up on the right side and angled downwards, with the black spots being eyes, then the nose, then lips, and he's got a hand tucked under his chin.
Profile shot.
We got to see the baby practice breathing and I also got a shot of the baby with his eyes open, but I thought it looked kinda creepy, so I didn't post.
Here's a few pictures of big brother from his birthday that I kept promising to post and have been super lazy.
Those two were at the fire museum, because my son LOVES "mew-mews" (aka fire trucks)
Fixing his car.
Those were at his party. I thought the one with him and baby Kermit was especially cute - baby Kermit was on the floor by the door waiting to go and Cayden walked up to him on his own and playing with him so gently. Makes me super excited to see him with the new baby :-)
Next posting if I stop being lazy again I'll post pictures of our pumpkin adventures.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Should be sleeping stead of keeping these late hours I've been keeping
I wasn't going to post until tomorrow, because until tomorrow I really have nothing of importance to say. Well, actually, technically it's not tomorrow anymore - technically since it's past midnight I wasn't going to post until later today. But here I am, because once again, I can't sleep, and what else is there to do? I've been watching re-runs of the nanny, playing solitaire on my phone while laying next to my sleeping husband, but then got heartburn and decided to sit up for a little while.
So here I am.
This week hasn't been a great week. It hasn't really been bad either, just... So-so. Normal, I guess. Work has been busy and I'm swamped and really am starting to think they're expecting too much of me. I could do all the work they want me to do, but I need to be there more in order to get in done in the time frame they want. Filing, which was supposed to be my main job, has taken a backseat because other things keep getting thrown at me. Don't get me wrong, it's not difficult, and I still love it there, but it does get a little frustrating because I feel like I'm falling behind and letting people down, as well as working my tail off to get little to no progress done - I just need more time there. My friend who brought me in is about to switch over there full time, and she's expressed wanting to bring me on full time. I waiver back and forth about that. I miss Cayden when I'm gone, and I'm only there for 2.5 hours a day. Still, I appreciate him more, I feel like I'm more patient with him, and I WANT to spend more time with him. Plus, Jeremy's still only working temp work, and they told him not to come in three days this week. We're lucky since we're living with my Mom right now and that means essentially no bills, but we're trying to save for when the baby comes so he can take some time off - which we'll NEED if I have my c-section. So having something steady would be really nice.
I don't know, we'll what happens.
A couple weeks ago Cayden slammed his finger in the door and today lost a nail because of it. It's honestly his first "major" injury and honestly it disgusts me. Now that the nail is totally off, it's not so bad, but earlier it was hanging on, and he was trying to feed me something, and I just imagined accidentally biting the nail and thought I was going to throw up. I feel bad for him too because I know it hurts, and there's not a whole lot I can do. Now that the nail is off it actually doesn't seem to be bugging him as much. Hopefully it grows back quickly.
Other than that, I'm just ready for it to be next week. This weekend is our only free weekend in October - we were going to go to the Pumpkin Patch but we did that last week, so we have nothing this weekend, although I'm sure we'll do something. It's just nice to not have plans. Tomorrow is my ultrasound, which I'm happy for, but also nervous about... I don't want my doctor to refuse my VBAC without even giving me a chance to VBAC. But I am curious to see baby's position and growth and see him again, so that's exciting. After I have a doctors appointment which I am NOT looking forward too. They just always take FOREVER. It's crazy to think though that I have 2 more bi-weeklys left and then we're on to weeklys. That's really going to blow.
Next week however, Cayden has his doctors appointment and then we go to the pumpkin show, and then that weekend we have a birthday party and my baby shower. I'm really excited about my shower, though I know it's going to be really small, I'm OK with that. I just really want to celebrate the baby. Plus, I've been nesting like crazy and really wanting to go out and buy things for the baby - and we don't really have a ton left to buy. So, I keep telling myself to wait until after the shower to see what we may get and then shop.
Alright. For someone who had nothing to say, I sure did say a lot. I'm off to try to go to sleep again. Well, I'll probably pee first.
Oh, PS: I posted this on the other blog, which I assume you all read, but if you don't, our computer has been screwy lately. My husband has worked a bunch on it: Installed things, uninstalled things, run a bunch of virus scans, ect. but nothing is working. He thinks the computer just may be old and done. So if I go MIA, that's probably the reason. I will try to get on through my phone and update if that happens though!
So here I am.
This week hasn't been a great week. It hasn't really been bad either, just... So-so. Normal, I guess. Work has been busy and I'm swamped and really am starting to think they're expecting too much of me. I could do all the work they want me to do, but I need to be there more in order to get in done in the time frame they want. Filing, which was supposed to be my main job, has taken a backseat because other things keep getting thrown at me. Don't get me wrong, it's not difficult, and I still love it there, but it does get a little frustrating because I feel like I'm falling behind and letting people down, as well as working my tail off to get little to no progress done - I just need more time there. My friend who brought me in is about to switch over there full time, and she's expressed wanting to bring me on full time. I waiver back and forth about that. I miss Cayden when I'm gone, and I'm only there for 2.5 hours a day. Still, I appreciate him more, I feel like I'm more patient with him, and I WANT to spend more time with him. Plus, Jeremy's still only working temp work, and they told him not to come in three days this week. We're lucky since we're living with my Mom right now and that means essentially no bills, but we're trying to save for when the baby comes so he can take some time off - which we'll NEED if I have my c-section. So having something steady would be really nice.
I don't know, we'll what happens.
A couple weeks ago Cayden slammed his finger in the door and today lost a nail because of it. It's honestly his first "major" injury and honestly it disgusts me. Now that the nail is totally off, it's not so bad, but earlier it was hanging on, and he was trying to feed me something, and I just imagined accidentally biting the nail and thought I was going to throw up. I feel bad for him too because I know it hurts, and there's not a whole lot I can do. Now that the nail is off it actually doesn't seem to be bugging him as much. Hopefully it grows back quickly.
Other than that, I'm just ready for it to be next week. This weekend is our only free weekend in October - we were going to go to the Pumpkin Patch but we did that last week, so we have nothing this weekend, although I'm sure we'll do something. It's just nice to not have plans. Tomorrow is my ultrasound, which I'm happy for, but also nervous about... I don't want my doctor to refuse my VBAC without even giving me a chance to VBAC. But I am curious to see baby's position and growth and see him again, so that's exciting. After I have a doctors appointment which I am NOT looking forward too. They just always take FOREVER. It's crazy to think though that I have 2 more bi-weeklys left and then we're on to weeklys. That's really going to blow.
Next week however, Cayden has his doctors appointment and then we go to the pumpkin show, and then that weekend we have a birthday party and my baby shower. I'm really excited about my shower, though I know it's going to be really small, I'm OK with that. I just really want to celebrate the baby. Plus, I've been nesting like crazy and really wanting to go out and buy things for the baby - and we don't really have a ton left to buy. So, I keep telling myself to wait until after the shower to see what we may get and then shop.
Alright. For someone who had nothing to say, I sure did say a lot. I'm off to try to go to sleep again. Well, I'll probably pee first.
Oh, PS: I posted this on the other blog, which I assume you all read, but if you don't, our computer has been screwy lately. My husband has worked a bunch on it: Installed things, uninstalled things, run a bunch of virus scans, ect. but nothing is working. He thinks the computer just may be old and done. So if I go MIA, that's probably the reason. I will try to get on through my phone and update if that happens though!
Friday, October 8, 2010
Life makes me sleepy
I've been slacking on posting. It's just that I have nothing to say - not a whole lot is going on except for complaints really. Well, not even a whole lot of complaining going on. I'm tired, that stinks but it's not horrible. I'm starting to get sore, but it's not nearly as bad as I was with my first - and that pregnancy started being uncomfortable at around 20 weeks, so I'm just happy that I've made it thus far with pretty much no problems.
I hate my doctor, butttt there's not much I can do about that, because I can't really switch doctors. And I don't even really hate her, I just... Don't like her. I get the feeling she's so new at this doctoring thing that she's going by the book because she doesn't have any experience doing things any other way, and that makes me nervous. I don't, the last visit we had was VERY frustrating. First of all, I waited an hour and forty five minutes before she came in to see me. And, I get it - they're doctors and are busy, so I expect this to happen every once in awhile, but it seems I never get out of there under an hour - and that's if I'm lucky. The majority of it is just waiting. I've said it before - I don't understand how it's OK to tell me that if I'm more than 10 minutes late to my appointment, it will be canceled and I will be billed for it, and if it happens more than 3 times I'll be released from the practice, BUT they can let me sit in a room for over an hour, and I'm just supposed to wait?
Anyway, the day before I had felt kind of crampy, had what I thought were a few contractions, and just felt off. I didn't feel off enough to go into the ER, but off enough that I wanted to mention it to her. However, when I went into her office, I was pretty sure that all the cramps/contractions/off-ness feeling was most likely the baby moving into a different position - my husband commented that my stomach looked smaller, I physically felt different, the baby was kicking in different spots, and when she went to find the heartbeat, it was in a different spot than it had been my whole pregnancy.
However, she still wanted to order a NST for me. She wanted me to go RIGHT THEN and have it done. I had my son with my who was literally on the floor throwing a fit. If I had thought something was wrong with the baby? I wouldn't have hesitated. But I really felt like everything was fine - again, I think she was just trying to go by the book.
Anyway, there was a mix up and the front desk person thought she wanted me to schedule a NST - when really she wanted me to go upstairs to labor and delivery to have one done. I didn't correct her, and since it was late Friday afternoon, they couldn't get me in till Monday. Monday rolls around and I'm sick with his horrible cold, so I call and cancel. Then, to cover my ass if my doctor ask me why I didn't reschedule, I called today to see if they even wanted me to reschedule. Movements, again, have been consistant, and I have an ultrasound (which I don't want, but whatever) and a doctors appointment next Friday.
The nurse was kind of rude, which they always are, which is another reason I'm not a fan of my office, and told me to just wait till the ultrasound because she couldn't get me in for a NST before my ultrasound anyway. Fine with me. But then I had another question about some shoulder pain I was having - I'm pretty sure it's no big deal, but I of course, made the mistake of googling shoulder pain in pregnancy, and it can be some pretty scary things, so I wanted to mention it to her ro see if she thought it was serious.
"Well, we can discuss that at your next appointment." And again, in not such a nice voice.
OK, so while I'm happy she didn't demand me coming into labor and delivery to get checked out (as some phone nurses will do - have you come in over NOTHING.) I still would have liked her to be a little more reassuring. "Oh, it's probably nothing, but if you experience x,y, and z, make sure you come in or call us back." would have been nice.
I dunno, no offense to any nurses out there, because my Mom is one, and I know how hard y'all bust your asses, and how little credit you get, but EVERY phone nurse I've ever come into contact with is a major bitch. I dunno if maybe it's because they're busy and have the added duty of answering phone calls as well, but seriously, you don't have to be mean about it. It happens ALL the time at my son's pediatrician's office.
Anyway, so that's pretty much my biggest frustration right now. I dread going to doctors appointments, and I dread it even more because soon I'll be going weekly. I am semi-excited for my ultrasound. It'll be neat to see how big Sprout is, and if he's head down and ready for the world. Plus, even though I know it's not likely, I'm hoping that MAYBE he'll flash the goods and we'll get a confirm that he's really a he. But I also don't want it because I don't want them to estimate him on the large side and then try to say I can't try for my VBAC. But, I really don't feel like like he is large, so... Maybe it'll end up working out in my favor? Keep your fingers crossed please.
We're almost to the end, and that makes me happy. I'm ready to see the new baby with Cayden, I'm ready to hold him, andddd I'm ready for him to just be here. However, we still don't have a name. which makes me SUPER nervous, but a lot of people told me it may just be that we have to see him to know him. We shall see.
My baby shower is on the 24th, and I'm excited for that, and excited for October to be over, because then we have one month left, and November is pretty much empty of things to do, with the exception of Thanksgiving and my cousin's wedding, so I'm going to RELAX.
I hate my doctor, butttt there's not much I can do about that, because I can't really switch doctors. And I don't even really hate her, I just... Don't like her. I get the feeling she's so new at this doctoring thing that she's going by the book because she doesn't have any experience doing things any other way, and that makes me nervous. I don't, the last visit we had was VERY frustrating. First of all, I waited an hour and forty five minutes before she came in to see me. And, I get it - they're doctors and are busy, so I expect this to happen every once in awhile, but it seems I never get out of there under an hour - and that's if I'm lucky. The majority of it is just waiting. I've said it before - I don't understand how it's OK to tell me that if I'm more than 10 minutes late to my appointment, it will be canceled and I will be billed for it, and if it happens more than 3 times I'll be released from the practice, BUT they can let me sit in a room for over an hour, and I'm just supposed to wait?
Anyway, the day before I had felt kind of crampy, had what I thought were a few contractions, and just felt off. I didn't feel off enough to go into the ER, but off enough that I wanted to mention it to her. However, when I went into her office, I was pretty sure that all the cramps/contractions/off-ness feeling was most likely the baby moving into a different position - my husband commented that my stomach looked smaller, I physically felt different, the baby was kicking in different spots, and when she went to find the heartbeat, it was in a different spot than it had been my whole pregnancy.
However, she still wanted to order a NST for me. She wanted me to go RIGHT THEN and have it done. I had my son with my who was literally on the floor throwing a fit. If I had thought something was wrong with the baby? I wouldn't have hesitated. But I really felt like everything was fine - again, I think she was just trying to go by the book.
Anyway, there was a mix up and the front desk person thought she wanted me to schedule a NST - when really she wanted me to go upstairs to labor and delivery to have one done. I didn't correct her, and since it was late Friday afternoon, they couldn't get me in till Monday. Monday rolls around and I'm sick with his horrible cold, so I call and cancel. Then, to cover my ass if my doctor ask me why I didn't reschedule, I called today to see if they even wanted me to reschedule. Movements, again, have been consistant, and I have an ultrasound (which I don't want, but whatever) and a doctors appointment next Friday.
The nurse was kind of rude, which they always are, which is another reason I'm not a fan of my office, and told me to just wait till the ultrasound because she couldn't get me in for a NST before my ultrasound anyway. Fine with me. But then I had another question about some shoulder pain I was having - I'm pretty sure it's no big deal, but I of course, made the mistake of googling shoulder pain in pregnancy, and it can be some pretty scary things, so I wanted to mention it to her ro see if she thought it was serious.
"Well, we can discuss that at your next appointment." And again, in not such a nice voice.
OK, so while I'm happy she didn't demand me coming into labor and delivery to get checked out (as some phone nurses will do - have you come in over NOTHING.) I still would have liked her to be a little more reassuring. "Oh, it's probably nothing, but if you experience x,y, and z, make sure you come in or call us back." would have been nice.
I dunno, no offense to any nurses out there, because my Mom is one, and I know how hard y'all bust your asses, and how little credit you get, but EVERY phone nurse I've ever come into contact with is a major bitch. I dunno if maybe it's because they're busy and have the added duty of answering phone calls as well, but seriously, you don't have to be mean about it. It happens ALL the time at my son's pediatrician's office.
Anyway, so that's pretty much my biggest frustration right now. I dread going to doctors appointments, and I dread it even more because soon I'll be going weekly. I am semi-excited for my ultrasound. It'll be neat to see how big Sprout is, and if he's head down and ready for the world. Plus, even though I know it's not likely, I'm hoping that MAYBE he'll flash the goods and we'll get a confirm that he's really a he. But I also don't want it because I don't want them to estimate him on the large side and then try to say I can't try for my VBAC. But, I really don't feel like like he is large, so... Maybe it'll end up working out in my favor? Keep your fingers crossed please.
We're almost to the end, and that makes me happy. I'm ready to see the new baby with Cayden, I'm ready to hold him, andddd I'm ready for him to just be here. However, we still don't have a name. which makes me SUPER nervous, but a lot of people told me it may just be that we have to see him to know him. We shall see.
My baby shower is on the 24th, and I'm excited for that, and excited for October to be over, because then we have one month left, and November is pretty much empty of things to do, with the exception of Thanksgiving and my cousin's wedding, so I'm going to RELAX.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Have I mentioned my I hate my MIL?
It's been a hectic week.
Late Wednesday night/early Thursday morning something started feeling a little off about the baby. I was a little crampy, had what I thought might be a few contractions, and some pressure. I thought about calling the doctor, but nothing felt bad, just... Different. The contractions didn't keep up and in fact stopped when I switched positions so I knew they weren't "real". I had an appointment the next day and decided just to talk to my doctor about it then.
Well, my husband was going to take a half day off (since we're down to one car, he kind of had too.) but then it turned into a full day because... Well, he had to work Saturday so it'd be made up for then, and just because. And it's a good thing he ended up going with me to my appointment, because they kept me waiting for an hour and a freaking half.
I was livid. Cayden was bored out of his skull, and tired, because he fell asleep in the car for 10 minutes and then refused to take the rest of his nap. It was just ridiculous.
Then they decided because of the things that had happened the previous day, they wanted me to go for a non-stress test right THEN. Uh, do you not see my child laying on the floor throwing a fit? I mean honestly if I thought something was wrong, I would have gone. But at that point, I was pretty sure that the baby had either moved positions or dropped - which was kind of confirmed when she found his heart beat in a totally different spot than she normally does.
Anyway, I went out to schedule my next appointment and they couldn't get me in for a NST then, so I'm supposed to go back Monday. I'm going to call and cancel because I'm sick (which I really am) and then just not re-schedule. Again, if I thought something was wrong, I would go. But I feel continuous movement, which is what they're going to measure me for, and I have an ultrasound next week anyway. So. No thanks.
Anyway, on top of all this, I start to feel a little under the weather. My nose is a little runny, my throat's a little gummy - a cold. Not GREAT, but I can handle a little cold, right?
Friday night I'm so exhausted and feeling so crappy I crash at 8 PM, and only because I forced myself to stay up that late. Wake up Saturday morning feeling like death warmed over. Can't stop coughing, throat is KILLING me, it's horrible.
I still have it, but it's not nearly as bad, and while I would like to spend the day in bed, I can function with it, which is good, because spending the day in bed is not an option when you have a two year old. Especially a two year old with a birthday party.
His birthday party was really fun, and EVERYONE showed up - which I was NOT expecting. I told my friend (who's house we held it at) that I honestly was only expecting 20 people - I was like "Yeah I got a lot of RSVP's, but I always do, and only half of them show."
Well, everyone showed this time, lol. It was crazy, but fun, and I think Cayden had a good time.
My MIL, however, needs to go to Church and burst into flames. I'm so over her, and really I have a feeling that shit between us is soon going to come to a head, because I can't even stand to be in the same room as her without feeling angry.
I didn't hear any of this, but my friend Shayne (who's house I was throwing the party at) overheard - and Shayne is not one to make mountains out of molehills, so I know she isn't just trying to create drama.
I guess it started when Cayden was opening presents. My cousin ended up getting Cayden the same hoodie that they got Cayden. My cousin didn't know this, and we didn't tell her, because... Well, I dunno, I feel like it's a little rude to be like "oh, he has that." I mean, she did tell me where she got it from, so I just planned on taking it back - she didn't need to know.
I guess my MIL got an attitude like "We got him that" and was all huffy. Which, isn't a big deal, but it's still like... Really lady? It's not like she did it on purpose - she doesn't even know you. Then someone else got us this folding playset which they have at their house, and again, I guess she got really worked up, and even told my husband three times that they already had it. Which, we knew that they did. And we kept telling her - it doesn't matter, because they keep that toy at their house and we don't have one at ours. She got the same snippy attitude when she found out that I had bought him a construction playset that she had - but again, she doesn't let us take his toys home, so why does it matter?
The part that really pissed me off is I was telling someone about the toy we got Cayden for his birthday. I dunno if I told you guys, it's a Fisher Price Wheelies Rampway. I told my MIL about 7 billion times NOT to buy it - and even showed her pictures - because *WE* we were buying it for him.
Well. She went out and bought it. And I hit the roof I was so mad - but Jeremy made her return it (even though she tried to give us the "I drove all over town" guilt trip)
Anyway, Cayden's rampway was a toy that was involved in the 10 bajillion toys that Fisher Price just recalled. Super, right? I JUST gave it to him, and now I have to take away the cars and send them off for replacements and it's going to take 8-12 weeks AFTER they recieve the cars.
So I was telling someone about the recall at the party, and how if we had kept the box, I would have just returned the toy to the store and then bought a new one - because not ALL the sets were involved in the recall (but of course, we ended up with the set that was, lol.)
Anyway, I guess she was going off to my FIL about how it was my fault, and how she told me she bought that toy for him, and if I would have just let her keep it none of it wouldn't have happened, and blah, blah, blah.
THAT pissed me off. I know, I know, it's so dumb, but it's like... I TOLD you that's what I was getting him, I TOLD you not to buy it, it's not my fault you're an idiot and can't remember, and the stupid recall was not my fault, and the set she bought him might have been involved as well, so it might not even matter.
I dunno, reading what I typed now, I'm kind of like... What's the big deal. It's just that the woman BUGS me. She doesn't even have to say anything anymore, just being around her BOTHERS me. She's just so fake, and I can't STAND it and want to call her out EVERY time I see her.
Like my friend invited her to my baby shower, and she put on the whole "I'm an awesome Grandma who can't wait till this baby arrives" act. And THAT peeves me off, because it's like... If we don't call you and schedule plans? You NEVER see Cayden. You haven't offered to buy this new baby anything or help out in ANY way, except to buy a pack and play for YOUR house which the baby will never use...
She's just so selfish, and it gets to me so badly, because I just wasn't raised by selfish people, and I'm really not used to being around them.
She makes me want to scream.
Late Wednesday night/early Thursday morning something started feeling a little off about the baby. I was a little crampy, had what I thought might be a few contractions, and some pressure. I thought about calling the doctor, but nothing felt bad, just... Different. The contractions didn't keep up and in fact stopped when I switched positions so I knew they weren't "real". I had an appointment the next day and decided just to talk to my doctor about it then.
Well, my husband was going to take a half day off (since we're down to one car, he kind of had too.) but then it turned into a full day because... Well, he had to work Saturday so it'd be made up for then, and just because. And it's a good thing he ended up going with me to my appointment, because they kept me waiting for an hour and a freaking half.
I was livid. Cayden was bored out of his skull, and tired, because he fell asleep in the car for 10 minutes and then refused to take the rest of his nap. It was just ridiculous.
Then they decided because of the things that had happened the previous day, they wanted me to go for a non-stress test right THEN. Uh, do you not see my child laying on the floor throwing a fit? I mean honestly if I thought something was wrong, I would have gone. But at that point, I was pretty sure that the baby had either moved positions or dropped - which was kind of confirmed when she found his heart beat in a totally different spot than she normally does.
Anyway, I went out to schedule my next appointment and they couldn't get me in for a NST then, so I'm supposed to go back Monday. I'm going to call and cancel because I'm sick (which I really am) and then just not re-schedule. Again, if I thought something was wrong, I would go. But I feel continuous movement, which is what they're going to measure me for, and I have an ultrasound next week anyway. So. No thanks.
Anyway, on top of all this, I start to feel a little under the weather. My nose is a little runny, my throat's a little gummy - a cold. Not GREAT, but I can handle a little cold, right?
Friday night I'm so exhausted and feeling so crappy I crash at 8 PM, and only because I forced myself to stay up that late. Wake up Saturday morning feeling like death warmed over. Can't stop coughing, throat is KILLING me, it's horrible.
I still have it, but it's not nearly as bad, and while I would like to spend the day in bed, I can function with it, which is good, because spending the day in bed is not an option when you have a two year old. Especially a two year old with a birthday party.
His birthday party was really fun, and EVERYONE showed up - which I was NOT expecting. I told my friend (who's house we held it at) that I honestly was only expecting 20 people - I was like "Yeah I got a lot of RSVP's, but I always do, and only half of them show."
Well, everyone showed this time, lol. It was crazy, but fun, and I think Cayden had a good time.
My MIL, however, needs to go to Church and burst into flames. I'm so over her, and really I have a feeling that shit between us is soon going to come to a head, because I can't even stand to be in the same room as her without feeling angry.
I didn't hear any of this, but my friend Shayne (who's house I was throwing the party at) overheard - and Shayne is not one to make mountains out of molehills, so I know she isn't just trying to create drama.
I guess it started when Cayden was opening presents. My cousin ended up getting Cayden the same hoodie that they got Cayden. My cousin didn't know this, and we didn't tell her, because... Well, I dunno, I feel like it's a little rude to be like "oh, he has that." I mean, she did tell me where she got it from, so I just planned on taking it back - she didn't need to know.
I guess my MIL got an attitude like "We got him that" and was all huffy. Which, isn't a big deal, but it's still like... Really lady? It's not like she did it on purpose - she doesn't even know you. Then someone else got us this folding playset which they have at their house, and again, I guess she got really worked up, and even told my husband three times that they already had it. Which, we knew that they did. And we kept telling her - it doesn't matter, because they keep that toy at their house and we don't have one at ours. She got the same snippy attitude when she found out that I had bought him a construction playset that she had - but again, she doesn't let us take his toys home, so why does it matter?
The part that really pissed me off is I was telling someone about the toy we got Cayden for his birthday. I dunno if I told you guys, it's a Fisher Price Wheelies Rampway. I told my MIL about 7 billion times NOT to buy it - and even showed her pictures - because *WE* we were buying it for him.
Well. She went out and bought it. And I hit the roof I was so mad - but Jeremy made her return it (even though she tried to give us the "I drove all over town" guilt trip)
Anyway, Cayden's rampway was a toy that was involved in the 10 bajillion toys that Fisher Price just recalled. Super, right? I JUST gave it to him, and now I have to take away the cars and send them off for replacements and it's going to take 8-12 weeks AFTER they recieve the cars.
So I was telling someone about the recall at the party, and how if we had kept the box, I would have just returned the toy to the store and then bought a new one - because not ALL the sets were involved in the recall (but of course, we ended up with the set that was, lol.)
Anyway, I guess she was going off to my FIL about how it was my fault, and how she told me she bought that toy for him, and if I would have just let her keep it none of it wouldn't have happened, and blah, blah, blah.
THAT pissed me off. I know, I know, it's so dumb, but it's like... I TOLD you that's what I was getting him, I TOLD you not to buy it, it's not my fault you're an idiot and can't remember, and the stupid recall was not my fault, and the set she bought him might have been involved as well, so it might not even matter.
I dunno, reading what I typed now, I'm kind of like... What's the big deal. It's just that the woman BUGS me. She doesn't even have to say anything anymore, just being around her BOTHERS me. She's just so fake, and I can't STAND it and want to call her out EVERY time I see her.
Like my friend invited her to my baby shower, and she put on the whole "I'm an awesome Grandma who can't wait till this baby arrives" act. And THAT peeves me off, because it's like... If we don't call you and schedule plans? You NEVER see Cayden. You haven't offered to buy this new baby anything or help out in ANY way, except to buy a pack and play for YOUR house which the baby will never use...
She's just so selfish, and it gets to me so badly, because I just wasn't raised by selfish people, and I'm really not used to being around them.
She makes me want to scream.
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