The honeymoon.... Is over.

For me, with both my kids, when I brought them home from the hospital, we were in a honeymoon period. I didn't need sleep damnit, because my energy came from holding this new tiny little bundle of joy. I didn't mind poopy diapers or being awoken fifty times in a single night, and this time around I could deal with my older son's outrageous behavior because he was adjusting and just needed a little extra attention, and I was super Mom and I can do everything and blah blah blah.

Then, with both of them, I hit a brick wall, and I'm done. Not that you CAN be done with kids, of course, but it literally feels like I ran into a brick wall. I am tired, I am sore, I am frustrated with so many things and so easily.

I am clearly a new Mother.

It seems if one of my boy's sleeps well, the other one is up every hour. Elijah only woke up three times the other night, which I don't think is bad for a newborn at all (especially considering my two year is usually up that many times.) But then Cayden didn't sleep well - and while Jeremy is on Cayden duty, he's sleeping rather hard lately so I had to wake him up to get up with him. Then the next night, Cayden only got up once (which again, if you know Cayden, this is a VERY amazing night for him.) buuuuuuuuuuuuut Eli was super fussy, which meant I was up.

Last night Eli was only up twice, which, again sounds so nice huh? Until you find out that the second time he woke up at 5 and didn't go back down till 8. Well, that's a lie, he'd go back down and the second I'd lay down he'd start fussing again. It was not a fun night, especially considering that I couldn't fall asleep, so I was up until 2, got up at three with him, and then up again at five. And really it's not the lack of sleep that sucks, because really, I can deal with being tired. But I'm getting these headaches from getting tired, and it seems the only thing that makes them go away is sleeping.

Eli also has this super sense to know when I'm about to eat. It NEVER fails that when I'm about to eat, he wants to eat too. Doesn't matter if he ate two seconds before, if I'm eating, he wants to eat. I'm becoming a master at eating one handed. However, he IS starting to eat more at once, so I'm HOPING that means he's going to go longer periods between feeding, which should mean more sleep at night.

All in all, I wouldn't trade it for the world, but now I remember why I don't love the newborn stage, lol. I would kill for just one full nights sleep, just ONE, so I can recharge. I got this with Cayden because my Mom would come and take him, but now that we have two... I'm just trying to hang in there because as I've said before, it won't be like this for long. And while I'm not really going to miss the sleepless nights, I am going to miss him being small enough to lay on my chest. Looking at Cayden compared to Eli... It's just like... When did he get so big? He USED to be this small, and now he's not, and where exactly did that time go? Two years seems like an awfully long time, but with Cayden, it just seemed to fly by.

Alright, Eli's napping, and even though my husband bless his heart got up with the kids and let me nap this afternoon, I could go for another nap. And then I have a billion things to do - like find what the hell happened to Eli's birth announcements so I can get them mailed out, and finish the boy's ornaments before Christmas (which is 8 days away, when the hell did THAT happen?) Oh, and try to get another post up for the other blog so I'm not such a slacker.

I also got the boy's newborn pictures back, so I'll have to post those sometime.